Save yo money fool! That is my second lesson to you. It might be more important than the first because if you don't save your money, you don't have to worry about trusting anyone with it. And you don't want to be broke, do you? So listen carefully and i will enlighten you with a bit of my money saving knowledge.
1. Don't have any friends. They are a money pit. No more, "hey bro, will you sponsor my horse for the Kentucky derby this year?" what you want to avoid. I find it easiest to not have any friends by becoming extremely loud in any situation involving a friend or friends. The louder you are, the more people hate you. Note: exceeding rudeness and body odor are equally effective
2. Vote republican. It doesn't matter your personal political preferences, if you vote republican, you will know the government will have your back when it comes to saving your money. Who says the top .001 percent doesn't deserve another yacht to complete their fleet? Not me, that's for sure.
3. Just carry your own golf clubs. Dreadful to imagine, yes, but when you begin to do it, you forget what it was like before. Caddies are a waste of money, and you will begin to find yourself spending an outrageous amount of it when you golf 6 days a week, as I do.
These are just a few suggestions, but believe me, there are many more. Its always important to remember to save yo money.
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